Thursday, January 03, 2008

Explaining The Wait

No one likes to wait, but it has been my experience that adoption is all about waiting. My son’s adoption was a happy surprise for me because we didn’t wait nearly as long as I thought we would. In fact, it took me completely by surprise. I do not have high hopes that our second will be as quick.

My family can be considered veterans of the adoption process. I’m not too worried about them. They know all about waiting and they were just as surprised by our quick adoption process as I was. I am worried about everyone else – my husband’s family, my friends and my co-workers. No matter how many times I tell them that it will be a lot longer, they still seem to think it’s coming soon.

It has always been my opinion that getting your hopes up or taking the earliest part of the estimate can just lead to more disappointment. As far as adoption goes, I tend to think about the worse case scenarios. I’m not a pessimistic person, but I am aware of the fact that I only control a very small part of the process. There’s a lot less stress for me when I remember that.

I hope everyone else figures that out soon. It’s a little stressful to explain the situation over and over and over…

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi! I just wanted to let you know that I love your blog, just found it today. I am just looking into adoption with my husband. We are strongly considering Korea. If you don't mind me asking, what agency are you using and what timeframe did they give you? We are considering Holt International, Spence Chapin, and New Beginnings agencies. We are very concerned about the wait time, especially after what happened with the China wait times in the last year or so and the upcoming Hague treaty that will be enacted on April 1st, causing a new amount of paperwork and processing for all adoptions. Thanks for your opinion.

--Christina

jenlyn said...

Hi,

My husband and I are among the masses waiting for a child from China, and we only just recently got our LID in Nov 07...ug....very depressing.
Right now, we are looking into Korean adoption for a second child while we are waiting the estimated 5+ year wait for our Chinese daughter.
We are thinking of using Wide Horizons for our adoption as we've heard good stuff about them.
It sounds like you have begun your second adoption application for Korea recently. What agency did you use? Any idea what the current wait times are? Our agency says 10-13 months, but we are afraid to be stuck in the waiting process for so many years again like China....
We're hoping a Korea adoption will go faster...
Thanks for your info and your wonderful blog.

-Jen

Mo said...

Jen - Feel free to e-mail me at koreaadoption@gmail.com.

Mommavia said...

That's why I always would tell our friends and family 3 months more than the longest estimate we were given! It saved me answering many, many questions...and this time around it's a surprise...shhhhhh!